Wisconsin has paved the way in divorce because of how often joint custody is awarded in divorce or custody battles.  This doesn't mean 50/50 placement in all of these cases, it just means that both parents need to work together to make choices for their children.  For those of you that have been through a divorce (or breakup with your partner), you know how difficult this can be.  Some have asked, if the two parents involved could get along for the sake of the children, wouldn't they still be together?  I've worked with a lot of people who are transitioning their relationship from parenting partners to that of co-parenting.  For those that I've worked with, the transition is difficult to say the least.  When I work with clients, we keep our co-parenting focused on the children involved rather than on the other person.  Research shows that children suffer in a custody battle despite their parent's best efforts in shielding them from it.  Each parent involved in the children's lives has their strengths and weaknesses.  Some are great at coaching in sporting events while others are better at helping with homework.  Working to see the positives in the parents involved rather than the negatives helps to change that relationship.  Divorce takes an average of four years to recover from.  This means there are people on opposite ends of the spectrum.  I've seen some people carry the pain and hurt of a divorce with them for 10 years.  That makes it hard to get to a point in your thinking where you're able to see the positives in your co-parent.  There are some techniques that I take my clients through that will help them get to this point.  Contact me for more information.  Most of the client's I work with have a change of view after only 5 sessions. 

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Kaern Becker, MA Life Coach